Friends suggest people I should date and I laugh it off because yeah, right, who would want to take a chance on me?
I develop romantic interests and subsequently get super anxious when I’m around them; all that energy eventually settles into friendship, which is fine!
Am I just preemptively rejecting anyone who would love me for me? Signed, I Wanna See Me Be Brave Dear Brave, Fuck being practical.
Practical about how you measure up to the other women on the dating market?
Flat, glossy images of size-0 teenagers can’t come close to conjuring the sensation of being alive in the company of TRUE charisma and sensuality and courage, that electric feeling of being close to someone confident and witty who, for some unfathomable reason, hasn’t been loved nearly enough.
Not to state the obvious, but men who like you for YOU roll with whatever you’re serving up. I understand why it would be a relief to voice that feeling.
Or they should want that, even if they can’t want it, deep down inside, because they don’t love themselves enough to believe that they are enough.
There’s nothing like being loved for exactly who you are.
A woman who can focus and make room — real space — for you, and bathe you in her generosity and her compassion. If that’s practical, then practical is the territory of unimaginative warthogs. And I know that I don’t know exactly how hard it is.
I have a plus-size friend who tells me there is nothing — NOTHING — like showing up for an online date and reading on the guy’s face, “Oh, you’re too big for me.” She tells me I can’t possibly know a thing about that feeling, and I trust that she’s right.Men like to be turned on (hello, understatement), and if they dig the cut of your jib, they are going to find something hot about you to focus on. But it falls in line with Older Men Only Want Younger Women and Successful Women Can’t Find Love and No One Wants a Short Guy and a million other self-defeating mantras.